Too Little Too Late
by Anieshwa
Summary: Ciel is seventeen and has been hunting for his revenge. The day arrives, but his life hangs in the balance. With a decision to make, hold onto the edge of the bridge and wait for Sebastian to suck his soul, or let go and plunge into his death. *SPOILERS*
1. Chapter 1

I do NOT own Kuroshitsuji or its characters, but I own this story.

CPOV:  
>My eyes widened as I slid towards the edge of the bridge. I desperately flung my hands out searching for something, anything to hold onto. I grabbed the edge as I slid off and by some miracle of God was able to hold myself there.<p>

I'm going to die. There's no way I can survive this, not while Sebastian is distracted. He probably can't tell I've almost fallen off. And if he has, who am I to assume he cares? I thought to myself as I tightly held my eyes closed.

"My lord, can you hold on until I count from ten?" Sebastian's voice cut through my thoughts and it took serious effort to say that yes, I could in fact last until he was finished counting. "Okay. Ten.." he started his counting montage and I could hear the relief in his voice as he began.

I had really been here once before, but never to quite this extent. And I had never worried over whether Sebastian could actually save me in time before. I had always just known. It struck me odd that he would save me when we were exacting my revenge as we spoke. By the time he was finished counting he would undoubtedly be through with Ash, and by then I would owe him my soul.

The thought of dying left me a little clammy. Five years ago I hadn't cared what happened to my soul, but after five years of trying to hunt down those responsible for my parents death, well of course I would grow closer to Sebastian in those years. He was more than the demon butler I had made a contract with so long ago. He was... Infinitely more, but I knew I was simply another soul to him.

"Three..." Somewhere in my thoughts I had lost all the other numbers, and I squeezed my eyes tighter if possible. I knew what was waiting for me after he got to one, and my heart clenched in pain at the irony before me; the man I loved was going to be the one to suck out my soul. There was something sort of poetic about the whole thing if you looked close enough.

"Two..." I was consumed by the fear of how Sebastian would go about taking my soul. I couldn't do this, I wasn't strong enough. I silently cursed the stubborn and arrogant child I had been so long ago.

"One." Dread spread through me and settled in my stomach. My arm hurt, my side hurt from the cuts I had received from the wreckage of their fight. I could hear Sebastian approach me and my breath hitched in fear. "All right master. It is done; you can open your eyes." So I did.

The sight that awaited me though broke my heart. Sebastian looked a tad haggard, but then again he HAD fought an angel. It was the look in his eyes. He had the will power to keep it off his face, but his eyes were a different story. I could see what, sadness, in them?

Through the haze of all my thoughts and emotions I couldn't fathom why he'd be sad. I was vaguely aware of his arm reaching for me, but in a split second decision I decided all this wasn't fair and I let go, plunging into the icy water below. The last thing I saw was the look of horror pass over Sebastian's face as he watched me fall.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Black Butler, or the characters, and I am terribly sorry it took so long to update!

_The last thing I saw was the look of horror pass over Sebastian's face as he watched me fall._

SPOV:

I watched Ciel fall for a fraction of a second before I was jumping after him. This couldn't be happening. He couldn't have let go. Why on Earth would he do that? I knew in an instant it was my fault. After all the years I had been... In his service, I had never told him how I felt about him. How could I? When we had first made the agreement he was a child. An earl, yes, but a child first and foremost. Now he was... different. Warmer, even. He had grown up, and in addition he had grown a certain warmth towards the people who were constantly in his life at the manor. But I had failed him.

I watched his small frame slam into the icy water below before I too, plunged beneath it's unforgiving surface. I opened my eyes and fought against the cold searching desperately for Ciel. At last I saw him, eyes drifting closed, limbs relaxed, hair floating like a halo of indigo; sinking to murky depths of the frigid water. A stab of fear constricted around my heart as I raced towards him and cradled him in my arms. I kicked fiercely until we were both above the surface, and used every ounce of strength I had left to get us to the shore.

I pulled Ciel against my chest as tears welled involuntarily into my eyes. "Please wake. Please be okay." I begged in quiet agony as I started to do CPR. I knew the deal we had made. I knew that whether he died right here, or by my own hand mattered not, his soul would be mine. What I realized as I watched him let go of the bridge and plunge into the water below, was that I didn't want his soul. Not unless he was included. It was him I wanted now, the affection I felt towards him that now motivated me, not the soul-hungry monster I had been when we met. All I did was for Ciel now. I protected him, I won things for him, I went out of my way to make sure he had at least one thing in a day that could make him smile. But in the blink of an eye, all that was changing.

I let tears fall as I leaned over his small body, continuing to revive him. This couldn't be it. It couldn't end here, in the pouring rain, on the bank of the river, before I could tell him... Tell him how much I adored him. How important he truly was. He couldn't die not knowing that I wasn't some blood hungry demon, or thinking that he wasn't important to me. I needed him more than I realized, more than he'll ever know, but I couldn't lose the chance to tell him all of that everyday. He hadn't even lived. All he had ever known was his thirst for revenge. He had never gotten to experience love, never had the chance to be loved.

"Come back... Please... I need... Ciel, I love you... Come back to me..."

CPOV:

I squinted my eyes in pain as I tried to force them open. Everything hurt, my head, my throat, my limbs; everything. I coughed as I tried to inhale breath down my raw throat and groaned as I forced myself into a sitting position. I couldn't focus on anything, I was too disoriented.

"Ciel, sweetie? How do you feel?" a vaguely familiar voice asked me before wrapping me into a hug. I was still too confused to understand what was happening. "Do you know what happened? What's the last thing you remember?" I frowned at that. What was the last thing I remembered? The fog in my brain was too much to fight and I winced at the wall of pain that shot it's way into my attempt at recalling anything.

Then, with a flash, and a gasp on my part, I remembered everything. The fight, holding onto the bridge... Letting go, plunging into the icy water. In an instant it all rushed back to me, and when I looked up and into the blue eyes above, I knew where I was.

I, was dead.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Black Butler. Nor do I own the characters. If I did…. Oh the things I would do! Anyways, sorry it took me so long to update. School and all that. Here it is! I hope you like. And uh, at the bottom, please shoot a review my way!

CPOV:

My breath came in shallow pants as I stared into the sapphire blue eyes that hovered above me. This could not be happening, but wait. I wanted this. I was the one who let go of the bridge to spare myself from Sebastian's hand. He was going to take my soul. I just rushed things along.

So why did I feel so empty?

Why did I _want_ to live?

"Ciel, sweetheart? Are you alright?" my mother's voice caressed its way around me. I felt no comfort from her once soothing voice. I struggled to my feet and looked around. The place was beautiful. Bright, open, a vast expanse of lush green hills that would make Monet faint, but all I could think of was how I longed for my bleak and rainy home.

"Mother…. What…. What am I doing here?" I asked in a choked whispered, throat burning as air stabbed its way through. She smiled sadly at me before responding. Saying the words, I did NOT want to hear.

"Dear, you're dead…. You… You get to be with us again, Ciel. We can be a family." She reached to wrap her arms around me, but I stepped back. Hurt flashed in her eyes and I just looked into them, mirror images of my own.

"Mother…. I. I want this. Truly I do, but not like this. I cannot stay…. Surely, you have seen the things I have done. I could never be allowed to stay here with you. The people I hurt, the things I have thought. My soul is not even my own anymore. I traded it to a demon."

My mother sighed and turned slightly away from me. "Your father and I have kept a close eye on you Ciel. Surely, you have seen the way that Sebastian looks at you. He won't take your soul. He would let you stay here with us, let you be happy, if you'll only let yourself. You could forget about him Ciel, and stay here, in heaven, with us."

I walked forward and put my hand on my mother's small shoulder. "I can't have that anymore. I lost that right seven years ago mother. Sebastian is what I have now, and I made him a deal. I cannot go back on it now."

She turned to embrace me and her smile warmed my heart. "I am so proud of you Ciel. I love you. Now we need to get you home. Look down."

SPOV:

He was gone.

The despair was closing in.

I did not care about anything anymore.

No soul could have torn me away from his body.

The reaper would be there soon.

I needed to get him out of the rain.

It was over.

I had failed.

Agony consumed me.

I had never felt so much despair.

I had never wanted to die before.

Now I could not remember why I had ever wanted to live.

Why had I agreed to take his soul?

Why did I not tell him I loved him?

I let him believe I was cold and heartless.

He thought I was going to kill him.

Maybe I am heartless.

I sobbed into his shoulder.

Then, the impossible.

A hand touches my shoulder.

A voice whispers my name.

And blue eyes stare into mine.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but my ideas. Sorry it has taken so long to update. It's been a busy year, but here it is!**

**SPOV:**

I couldn't believe my ears. Surely, I had lost every ounce of sanity I ever possessed; the voice calling to me was a hallucination. It had to be. But when I looked I saw those beautiful sapphire eyes looking at me weakly.

The tears only increased in frequency as I held him closer to me. "Ciel, oh Ciel. I thought you were dead! Why would you do that?! I told you to hold on, you said you would hold on! How could you give up on me?!" I was so angry, so happy, I didn't even know how to act towards him at that moment.

"Sebastian…? Why are you crying?" he asked in a voice hoarse from drowning. I laughed at the absurdity of his question.

"Why am I crying? Why am I crying? You just _drowned. _I just watched the _man I love _drown. Why _wouldn't _I be crying?" I couldn't bring myself to let go of him enough to see his reaction.

**CPOV:**

I stared at Sebastian, unable to comprehend what he had just said. "You… You love me? I drowned myself because I thought….. You won…. I thought you were going to take my soul…. I thought that you didn't love me….." Tears welled to my eyes. Was everything he was saying true?

"Master, how could you be so foolish? How could you be that blind? Of course I love you Ciel. How could I not? After all the years we've been together I would have to be completely heartless not to fall for you."

"It's ironic, isn't it? The man I love, who happens to love me in return, has to suck out my soul. The love of my life is going to end my life." I laughed a bit and I couldn't deny the insanity lurking beneath that laugh's surface.

Sebastian's face softened as he looked into my eyes. "Ciel, I'm no…." he started but I simply cut him off.

"It's okay. I wouldn't want anyone else to take it. It all belongs to you anyways, and I really don't mind the idea of death. Not if you are the one who ends it for me." I said closing my eyes as I waited for him to take my soul. But nothing happened.

Suddenly there was the lightest pressure on lips. I gasped and my eyes flew open, but Sebastian only took my surprise as a chance to deepen the kiss. My eyes fluttered close as I leaned into his kiss. His arms tightened around me, pulling me closer, closer, closer. I was drowning in him, his touch, his smell, it was consuming me.

He pulled back slowly, and I panted as I stared at him for a moment. "I would never take your soul Ciel. I've known…. Well for a while that when we made it to this point, that I would never be able to take your soul."

My heart clenched at his words but then my stomach dropped. "You have fulfilled your end of the bargain. You are free from our contract. You…. You no longer have to stay by my side." I dropped my eyes from his and tried weakly to sit up on my own.

His hands gently stopped me from moving away from him. "Sebastian, wha…" but the question was lost as he once again forced his mouth onto mine. I kissed back with a desperation, afraid that he would truly leave.

He pulled back again, but continued to trail kisses down my jaw and onto my neck. "I am not going anywhere, my lord. How could I leave now. As it so happens, our contract seems to have evolved. The mark of our contract remains on my hand, just as it remains in your eye. So…" he continued to speak as his lips teased my collar bone, causing a moan to escape from my lips. "Until the moment you decide you no longer love me, or no longer…. Desire me." He punctuated that with a bite to the sensitive spot. "I shall remain in your service."

I moaned in response as I forced his lips back to my own. "I am afraid then Sebastian, that you will be waiting an awfully long time." His smirk grew before he placed a light kiss to the tip of my nose. "I am used to waiting on you. Besides," he said standing, me still in his arms, "I have eternity to spend with you until then."

I smiled a watery smile at him. "Do you mean that? Will you really stay with me?" He kissed me gently before replying. "Of course I will. Come now, let's go home." He pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead before carrying me to _our _home.


End file.
